We all love our little darlings, but sometimes they can press a nerve. Like when you tell them not to touch something and they touch it anyway. Or may be you ask them to clean up their mess and they keep making a mess. What about when you take them to the grocery store and they pick up everything in sight and put it in the shopping cart. These are just some of the things that our angels do to rack our nerves and try to drive us mad. But we love them and if you are like me, being a grandma, most of the time they get away with it. Children can really show out when they want to. I mean it! My granddaughter Heaven just started Kindergarten and she is a handful. She feels that anything she wants, she should get. Their is no compromising with her. Its her way or no way!!
So how do we as grandparents and parents handle those little ones who insist to have their way. I have developed some ideas that I believe will be helpful.
1. One thing I have found out is that children when they are a certain age don't care about who is in control. They really want to do their own thing whether you agree to it or not. So, the main thing that we must do is get our control back. Somewhere down the line we lost it by allowing them to have their way and get away with things. Be aware and in control at all times even if they don't think you are. They are precious and we love them, but they are going through a stage where discipline is important. During preschool age they love to harass you. My granddaughter just looks at me and laughs when I try to discipline her. So, I have to take away something that she has for awhile until she realizes that I am serious. Then she says to me "grandma you are so mean." Well, life is full of lessons and it is best that they learn early in life to do as they are told. I always tell my grandchildren why they are having something taken away from them for awhile or can't do something that they really enjoy. This way they will understand why this is happening to them. After they do what they were told, they can have their privileges back.
2. We have to remember that we are responsible for them and it is up to us to nurture and train them to grow up the right way. Children need us to show them the right way to go because they really don't know what that way is. Teaching begins at home and by the time they reach school age, they should be equipped with what they need to continue growing.
3. Stick to your rules! A lot of times we tend to stare away from what we say that we are going to do. We see those cute little faces and melt away, but being a little firm is good. You are actually building character in your little one. We have to train a child in the right way so when they grow up, they wont stray off the path.
4. It really bothers me to see children running up and down the grocery store isles. It is a headache for the person who is in care of the children. Most importantly, it is so very dangerous to allow children to rome around without you. Before taking them to the store, have a serious one on one talk with them about behaving. Let them know that you will not tolerate any misbehavior. Give them something to look forward to when going to the store. Tell them that maybe if they behave they can pick out one thing under a certain amount for good behavior. I always tell my grands when we go out shopping to stay close to me at all times and do not go picking up things off the shelves with permission. Whatever you do please don't pass the toy isle; they will go mad on you! :) Be careful of that but if for some reason you have to pass the toy isle, do it fast! Redirect them to another area in the store. Its something about the toy isle and kids. They go wild!
5. When my children was young, I would have quiet time. During this time, all the children quiet down and relax and think. Sometimes they would read a book or take a nap, but it was time for all of us to let our body, mind and spirit calm down. A time to relax and unwind.
6. Once a week or as needed, we had a meeting. We talked about our day, how school went, if anyone had any issues, just want ever was going on in our minds. We embraced each other, supported one another and had a wonderful time together. They were of school age and had plenty to talk about so it was open floor for everyone. Also when they misbehaved, we talked about it. I always asked them "what could they have done different? Allowing your children to express themselves in their own words helps them to understand, learn how to communicate and grow.
7. When they behave, do good in school or whatever they do well, I always reward them. For cleaning up their room and doing their chores, I would give them an allowance.
8. Communication is important. Like always we have to communicate with each other in order to express our thoughts. Teaching children how to communicate correctly is essential concerning their healthy mental growth. They have to learn how to express themselves verbally without getting upset when they can't have their way. Of course this skill develops in time. I always ask them to tell me how they feel, and I always tell my grands not to be afraid to speak whats on their minds. I tell them not to disrespect anyone by saying ugly things.
9. Patience is a virtue. Children don't really no what this phrase means. They want it, and they want it now!! So, how to you teach children to have patience? In my opinion, patience in children takes a lot of time and effort. First you need to be patient with them. You have to show them just how patience work. When they want something now and you can't get it for them, they have to learn to wait. They might not like that idea of waiting for something they want, but in life one has to be patient. They might cry, throw a tantrum or even pout, but that's okay. They will understand and learn the meaning of patience and that is to wait. Plain and simple.
10. We have to understand that children will be children. Every child has their own personality. Some may be easy to deal with, and some may give you a pain right between the eyeballs. :) Whatever the case may be, patientence, communicate and understanding that they have to be taught how to behave. And, that's not so easy to do at times. Sometimes you have to repeat yourself until they understand what you mean. Practice makes perfect kids. The more they practice good behavior, the more they will behave. :) The good thing about being a grandparent is that after you have taught them, they get to go home to mom and dad for some more teaching. :)
No comments:
Post a Comment